Insight #274:
At work, should you ask open-ended questions in the wrong tone of voice? Yes, you should! That is, if you are a “real” boss. It’s your job to put employees on the spot and trip them up. How else will you know what’s really going on?
Hang on, hang on. If that’s your go-to questioning style, then maybe you are making things worse. Not sure what I mean? I don’t know how you react to open-ended questions asked in a certain tone of voice, but let me tell you how I feel about them with this classic example.
“What are you doing on Saturday?”
As a once eligible bachelor (of course I was), I dreaded this question. There was always the risk that if I answered “nothing”, they would then ask me to do something I might not enjoy.
Even though I have not dated in ages, I still get annoyed when asked this sort of open-ended question.
What I wish people will understand is that open-ended questions create social disharmony. These questions don’t allow us room to maneuver. Considerate people always ask bluntly the question inconsiderate people only ask after you hesitatingly admit, “Nothing.”
Please ask your tricky questions bluntly. Even bravely. “Will you have dinner with me on Saturday?” Then I can decide whether I am already otherwise engaged, or whether it is worth the danger of asking my wife’s permission to be alone with you.
Come to think of it, I wish my wife would stop asking, “What are you doing on Saturday?” in that tone of voice.
But at work, you can forget about wishing tricky questions away. The only way you can avoid them is to become the boss asking the questions in a certain tone of voice.
Then you, too, can practice the art of making innocent questions like “Are you busy?” sound ominous.
Welcome to my side of the nonsense divide.
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Quote of the Moment:
“One of the most underrated perks of being a boss is having the power to ask inconsiderate open-ended questions.” The Chief Nonsense Officer.
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