I’ve been told that I am full of nonsense. That is simply not true, because I know what I stand for.

We all know that when you don’t stand for something, you will fall for any old nonsense. So let me prove to you that I am a no-nonsense sort of guy by telling you what I stand for:

I’m against any healthcare bill… until I fall ill.

I’m against government meddling in the economy… until I lose my job.

I’m against higher taxes… until I need unemployment relief.

I’m against road taxes… until I hit a pothole.

I’m against regulated businesses… until I get scammed.

I’m against gun control… until I get shot.

There you have it.

What do you mean that you still don’t know what I stand for? It’s perfectly clear, isn’t it?

I stand for the right to be against any solution until I get hurt by the problem.

Welcome to my side of the nonsense divide.